On Sunday my step dad of 14 yrs was found dead in his apartment. I was there when the cops found him. I was there alone for 45 minutes waiting for my sister or Kyle to come up there. I was comforted by complete strangers. I had to tell his daughter who he hasn't seen in 20 yrs that he was dead. She was (well is) coming up here this weekend to reconnect with him. I had to tell his best friend of 40 yrs that he died. This absolutely sucks. And it gets worse. Since my mom and him aren't together anymore we have no legal day in anything. It's all up to his family that doesn't talk to him and his daughter. Brit and I are nothing. They say they are trying do things the best way they know how but it sure doesn't feel that way. There hasn't been an obituary yet. There hasn't been a date for the funeral yet. And I know there are people coming from all over the country but still. I've never had to experience a funeral where everyone doesnt either just jump on a plane or drive to get here for the family that's been here; taking care of him for the past 15 yrs. we are all grieving. Emotions are on high. Stress through the roof. I just wish I could be involved more. I feel 150% useless.
Kyle is taking this extremely hard. He and ray were very close. He owes his career to him. Ray took him in when he got kicked out of the house after high school. Supported us financially when we needed it. Was his mentor. And he's completely gone now. Kyle is a wreck
This whole experience has showed me that you can not take life for granted. A horrible accident could happen in the blink of an eye.
I love you ray. You were more of a dad to me than my own dad at times. We may have fought a lot and not seen eye to eye but I know now you were just trying to help me. I love u more than you probably ever knew. Keep looking down on us, protecting over the grand babies. Tell nana and papa hi for me.
1 comment:
oh god Hil, I could barely get through a quarter of this without crying. I am still so sorry to hear about Ray. I know what it's like to lose a parent and though I was much younger, it still hurts. I would be devastated if I lost my dad now (my step dad) but he has been more of a father to me than my own dad. I am so sorry for Kyle too, Tad and my dad are close now as well and I can't imagine the toll it'll take on us as a family. I hope you guys are able to come to some type of agreement to where you and Kyle have more of a say, maybe it won't be a legal thing but maybe a respect thing from his side of the family. I really hope they see that you have been his close family for such a long time and give you guys that respect. I'm here if you need to vent, bitch or just catch up on life. even though we aren't close like we were when working together, I still love ya and miss you lots <3... I wish that we were closer again or even that Jess and I could talk and have both of you to hang out with when things get tough or just to be all be friends again. Maybe one day. Hang in there, it may not get easier but it makes you love everything that much more in life.
Post a Comment